Today I e-mailed a directing idol of mine. I had e-mailed her previously and she responded immediately and with a warmth that caught me off guard. It was wonderful and the gesture alone is one that encourages me.
In the e-mail that I sent this morning, I happened to include a link to my youtube page...selfishly perhaps. Either way, it resulted in me returning to my shorts and looking at them with a different lens. I've done a lot of film watching, film studying, and film working this summer and my views have changed somewhat. I'd like to believe that I've improved my eye and the way in which I do things.
When I finished looking at my films, I discovered I had become somewhat embarrassed that I had sent one of my idols this incredibly flawed films. Don't get me wrong, I think there are good things to all of my work, but I've definitely improved. I also really hope I can finish what I'm working on currently so I can feel less bad about my catalogue as a whole.
I decided I could make a fun entry out of my feelings, and change the review after review business of this blog. Please, join me whilst I critique all of my films. Ready? Go:
1. Eternal Return
This was my first film. Over ambitious and over written. It plays like a really shitty Woody Allen film. I love the look of it, but not the quality of my old DV camera. We filmed it all in a single night, and I do believe that if I we had more time to do this film (and if I had any sense of self-editing at the time) that this would be a film with a little better shelf life. The source material is great and I think the ideas are there. The music is matched very well. I'd actually love to remake this film.
2. ¿Bebes? A Drama in Spanish
Funny enough, this film got me into a film program at MSU. In hindsight, although I still think its a bizarre riot, it's not due to my shitty directorial work. I still do not understand why the puddle of water looks like urine, but I didn't have the ability to edit the color. The music is matched well, but that's about the only good thing that I did. The writing was top notch and the acting is so over the top that it's perfect. Again, now that I have a camera that's decent and understand how to film things, this could be a lot better short. It was also filmed in an afternoon, so time probably harms it, too. But, really, I'm the only one that holds this film back.
3. 2.7.5.
This is probably the one short that I find the least fault in. It's a little over dramatic and my acting it's solid throughout, but I think it's a lot stronger than I even anticipated it would be. I was watching a lot of Brakhage (can you tell?) and was really into the "I'm a film major!"feel...which you can also see, I'm sure ("I'm a Film Major" could easily be an alternative title to this short). The footage is mostly pretty nice. I love the shot of my girlfriend, although I really regret not getting a man to also fill in her same place, as I originally planned. Those images were meant to be about wanting a connection, and I worry that it becomes a hetero-sexualized thing. It's not meant to be.
The film is about isolation, and the intentional documenting of this loneliness. The camera becomes an enemy, as the character realizes it's merely an extension of himself, not a substitute for a connection. For the most part, I feel it conveys these feelings pretty darn well.
4. Royal Oak: An Alternative City
The Footage looks nice, the the music is great, but quite honestly I was overreaching. I don't know how to properly edit footage like this. I didn't have a microphone to properly get sound. I didn't have the time to travel from campus to Royal Oak to put enough time into this. Like my first two shorts, time and poor planning got the best of this short. For better or worse, though, this was easily the best project in the course that I used it for. Perhaps it deserves more credit than I am giving it?
5. TCFF Bumper Entry
I didn't know that when the Traverse City Film Festival was asking for entries for the past film festival surrounding the theme "Why Traverse City? Why not!" that it wanted really heart-warming, tourism-ready Traverse City footage. The shorts that were accepted were all great, and none were inspired by Tim and Eric like mine was. All of the shorts that I saw that were accepted also incorporated local footage, something I did not have access to.
Is it funny? Yes, but I don't think it really makes any sense. Abbi and Emily went all out in this short, and I really wish I had written something better for them to do. They gave their all, I threw a bunch of junk against a wall.
6. Unseen
I loved all the absurd extra footage from shooting our bumper entry that I made a short video that is a hybrid outtake footage, but it also deals with the concept of filmic bodies. I really focused on creepy faces and bizarre movements that the footage and mechanisms at play created. They weren't things that Abbi and Emily did, they were things that the film did to them. Also, isn't the Beach Boys music great? This isn't bad, but, like the bumper entry, I don't know if it really adds up to much.
With that being said, I hope I can deliver stronger stuff. I'm still mostly a one-person crew, so as I continue to meet people and start working with others, I'm sure the quality will improve. This wasn't meant to be a post about why all my shit sucks. I still think there's a lot of good in this stuff, but I've not only recently been able to look at this stuff critically.
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